Stephen H. Branch's Alligator, Vol. 1 no. 15, July 31, 1858
Author: Unknown
Date: 2017-06-11T00:00:00+00:00
Keywords: New York (N.Y.) -- Politics and government

The Project Gutenberg eBook of Stephen H. Branch's Alligator, Vol. 1 no. 15, July 31, 1858

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Title: Stephen H. Branch's Alligator, Vol. 1 no. 15, July 31, 1858

Editor: Stephen H. Branch

Release date: June 11, 2017 [eBook #54894]
Most recently updated: October 23, 2024

Language: English

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*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK STEPHEN H. BRANCH'S ALLIGATOR, VOL. 1 NO. 15, JULY 31, 1858 ***

Transcriber Notes

- Obvious printer errors and missing punctuation fixed. Archaic and inconsistent spelling, variations in hyphenation retained.

- The table of contents has been created and added by the transcriber.

- The cover has been created by the transcriber and placed in the public domain.

James Gordon Bennett and Fanny Elssler. | 1
Richard B. Connolly and other Conspirators against my Liberty. | 1
My Trial. | 2
National Degeneration! | 2

Does Mayor Tiemann know what became of the Lime Kiln Man? Most horrible disclosures! In God’s name, where are the People?

3

Bennett, Greeley, and Raymond. | 3
The Peter Cooper Institute! | 3
Advertisements. | 4

Volume I.—No. 15.]SATURDAY, JULY 31, 1858.[Price 2 Cents.

STEPHEN H. BRANCH’S
ALLIGATOR.

James Gordon Bennett and Fanny Elssler.

Fanny’s Parlor.

Bennett (Softly knocks)—Fanny, dear, are you in?

Fanny—Who’s there?

Bennett—Thy friend.

Fanny—Thy name?

Bennett—James Gordon Bennett.

Fanny—Gracious Heaven! (She unlocks the door.)

Enter Bennett.

Bennett—Good morning, sweet Fanny.

Fanny—A kind salutation to my noble friend.

Bennett—Where’s Wyckoff?

Fanny—I don’t know.

Bennett—Will he return soon?

Fanny—I guess not.

Bennett—Then come and sit in my lap.

Fanny—I will. (She bounds to Bennett’s knees.)

Bennett—Now kiss me.

Fanny—There! (Smack! smack! smack! and the last on his lips.)

Bennett—O! how sweet!

Fanny (archly)—You don’t say!

Bennett—Yes, I do.

Fanny—And so do I.

Bennett—Then give me another cluster of kisses.

Fanny—I’ll give you a dozen or a hundred, if you will only puff me well, and fill the theatre every night.

Bennett—Have I not puffed you well, my darling?

Fanny—W-e-l-l—y-e-s. Wyckoff says I am increasing my popularity every day. And now if you will only continue to puff me, my dear Mr. Bennett, I will hug and kiss you, and love you ever so dearly. And do you know that I intend to give your beautiful wife some precious jewels?

Bennett—Wyckoff said you contemplated a splendid donation to my fair lady.

Fanny—O yes, dear Mr. Bennett, the jewels are all purchased, and your dear wife shall have them soon.

Bennett—Hush! fair creature! Don’t talk so loudly. Is the door locked? I hear footsteps. Some one ascends the stairs. If you are seen in my lap, old Mordecah M. Noah will get hold of it, and put it in his Caudle Lectures, which bite me terribly.

Fanny—The door is locked, and you need not be afraid, as it is only the servant coming to bring me some wine and water, and to dust my parlor.

Bennett—Well, give me one more fervent kiss, and let in the servant, and I will depart, and return soon, unless you expect Wyckoff. It won’t do for us both to be here at the same time, you know, eh?

Fanny—I hardly think it will, although I love you both.

Servant—(Knocks.)

Fanny—Busy! (Servant goes down stairs.)

Bennett—Which do you love best—me or Wyckoff?

Fanny—I love you the best, dear Mr. Bennett. Most people call Wyckoff the handsomest, but I think you are the prettiest man I ever saw. Your voice is so sweet, and your complexion so fair, and your features so Grecian, and your smile so lovely, and your heart so kind, and your figure so commanding, and your eyes so expressive of a large humanity. O, Mr. Bennett, I most dearly love you, and now I desire to know if you love me, and how much? And before you tell me, there’s another luscious kiss on your fragrant lips. And now, dear friend, do tell me how much you love your grateful and affectionate Fanny?

Bennett—O, I love you most ardently, and I have a mind to give Wyckoff a touch of the Italian, and marry you, and hide ourselves in some deep mountain glen of my beloved Scotland.

Fanny—O, if you would only do all that.

Bennett—What! kill Wyckoff, and marry you, and desert my devoted wife and child?

Fanny—To be sure. Did you not say you would?

Bennett—O Heaven! Fanny! I am very nervous. Your extraordinary fascinations will ruin me, and I must fly.

Fanny—Whither?

Bennett—To my office.

Fanny—What! Havn’t you the pluck to kill Wyckoff, and marry me, and all my jewels, and the vast possessions I have acquired through my grace and agility?

Bennett—Darm it, Fanny, no more to-day. Give me a parting kiss, and I will go, and we will resume this delightful theme to-morrow, when Wyckoff is promenading Broadway, or arranging your affairs at the Theatre and the printing offices. So, good-by, my adored Fanny—farewell, my precious solace and incomparable divinity.

Fanny—A fond adieu, my charming admirer. Come again to-morrow, or I shall die. (She cries like a female Crocodile.)

Bennett—Farewell.

Fanny—Farewell—my benefactor. O farewell!

(He goes, and Fanny leaps, and dances, and laughs, and screams, and wildly rejoices over his departure.)

The reader must now imagine the lapse of many years.

Bennett’s Office.

Bennett—Mr. Hudson, don’t let Ross & Tousey have any more Heralds for their country agents.

Hudson—Why?

Bennett—Because I learn that they have got all my little private arrangements with Fanny Elssler stereotyped, and intend to publish my connection and black mail operations with Elssler and Wyckoff, which will mortify me extremely, and forever degrade me in the eyes of the people, and of my wife and children.

Hudson—I will see that Ross & Tousey obtain no more Heralds.

Bennett—Give the order immediately, to expel Ross & Tousey forever from our establishment.

Hudson—I will. (Rings the bell.)

Enter Paper Superintendent.

Superintendent—What is your desire, Mr. Hudson?

Hudson—Let Ross & Tousey have no more Heralds. They have offended Mr. Bennett.

Superintendent—Is it possible? I’ll see that they get no more Heralds. (He goes.)

(Hudson goes to Bennett’s private room.)

Hudson—I have given your order, and it will be instantly obeyed.

Bennett—That will suffice. (Hudson retires.)

(To be continued.)

Richard B. Connolly and other Conspirators against my Liberty.

In 1855, Richard B. Connolly said he would give me a clerkship in the County Clerk’s Office, if I would not expose his unnaturalized alienage. I declined his infamous proposition. He then got Alderman John Kelly to read a letter to the Board of Aldermen, declaring that he was born in Ireland, and first landed in Philadelphia, where he got naturalized in Independence Hall, and that he valued the frame that contained the evidences of his naturalization, more than any piece of furniture in his house, and invited all to call at his residence, and behold its graceful suspension on his parlor wall. I called, and his wife assured me that her husband was absent, and that his naturalization papers were in a trunk, and that he had got the key. Alderman John H. Briggs called, when Connolly was at home, but he was not permitted to see the evidences of his naturalization. Other citizens, and many of Connolly’s most intimate friends called and desired to see his naturalization papers, but he declined to show them. I then went to Philadelphia, and got certificates from the clerks of all the Courts, that Richard B. Connolly, of Ireland, was never naturalized in the Philadelphia Courts, and I returned, and published the results of my visit to Philadelphia in the New York Times, and other journals, and also stated that Connolly strove to bribe me not to expose his alienage. At the election of County Clerk, which followed these events, Connolly did not vote, and when taunted with his refusal to vote by his adversaries, he excused himself on the ground that he had bet largely on several candidates, and dared not vote. This was the very small aperture through which he crawled. And this is the scamp who is to impannel the jury by which I am soon to be tried for the alleged libel of Tiemann and Cooper and Connolly’s most sacred friend, Simeon Draper, with whom he was long a clerk, and with whom he has been connected in schemes of plunder and political villainy for nearly a quarter of a century. From Connolly’s notorious character as a sly and cunning and treacherous rascal, and Jury Packer, and ballot stuffer, and public robber, I have every reason to believe that he will pack the jury that will try me. And he has four powerful motives for packing my jury, and sending me to Blackwell’s Island: And firstly, to avenge my exposure of his perjured alienage, and secondly, to prove his fidelity to his old friend, Simeon Draper, and thirdly, to win the favor of Tiemann and Cooper, and secure their support of him as Comptroller, and fourthly, to incarcerate me while he seeks his nomination and election as Comptroller, so that I cannot expose his perjured alienage and nefarious crimes, during his efforts to obtain an office, which will enable him to steal millions from the Treasury, and thus rob the toiling millions of their bread and raiment and shelter from the pitiless elements, and drive many a lovely virgin, of sick and indigent parents, to the horrors of prostitution. In 1852, he was almost penniless, but now he is worth a million of dollars, which he has stolen directly from the pockets of the honest and laborious classes, for whom he professes exhaustless love. With the Mayor and nearly all the Executive Departments, and Connolly, Draper, Sickles, Hart, and the Herald, Times, and Tribune, and other journals, and Peter Cooper, and Ex-Mayor Kingsland, and other millionaires against me, it seems almost impossible to escape a sojourn at Blackwell’s Island, but I have confidence in God and truth and justice, and I defy all the powers of earth to vanquish my soul. And I most fervently thank the Great Disposer of Events, that if I am consigned to a felon’s cell, it will not be for robbing the friendless multitudes, like such thieves as Tiemann, Cooper, Draper, and Connolly, who may not be incarcerated and tortured for their deeds of villainy while living, although a terrible retribution awaits them beyond the grave. Stephen, of old, was stoned for his virtues, and Socrates poisoned, and the Saviour crucified, and a poor, humble, and friendless being like me, may be imprisoned, and forced to die in a dungeon, for exposing the public robbers of the present generation. But I will not murmur at the terrible ordeal through which I am about to pass. For my fidelity to the people, I may lose my liberty. Be it so. And when the public thieves have consigned me to a lonely and dreary cell, and my frail form slowly wastes away, and I am forever gone, my absent soul will only crave a humble mound, and the tears of the virtuous, to bless and fertilise the pretty flowers that prance over my grassy hillock, in the mild summer perfume.

Stephen H. Branch’s Alligator.

NEW YORK, SATURDAY, JULY 31, 1858.

STEPHEN H. BRANCH’S “ALLIGATOR” CAN BE obtained at all hours, at wholesale and retail, at No. 114 Nassau Street, (Second Story), near Ann Street, New York.

My Trial.

Mr. Sedgwick informs me that I will be tried on the first Monday in August. I shall be ready, and I dare Mayor Tiemann to meet me on that memorable day. It grieves me to know that my witnesses will overwhelm him with disgrace, because his wife and children will be degraded through all their posterity. But for Tiemann, and Peter Cooper, and Edward Cooper, I have no sympathy, because they have been recreant to the people, in their appointment of thieves and assassins to the most lucrative and honorable offices. Daniel F. Tiemann has been a hypocrite and a public thief, since he was Alderman in 1838. Peter Cooper has been a public plunderer since he was Alderman in 1828, and a heartless miser through all his days; and Daniel and Peter are training young Edward to imitate their pernicious example. Peter Cooper is the father of illegitimate children, who reside in the vicinity of his Glue Factory, at Bushwick, and Daniel F. Tiemann has long kept a mistress on Randall’s Island, and committed other deeds of hell, as I will prove on the first Monday in August. Let there be no postponement of the trial, as I yearn for a conflict, that will consign the foes of the people to undying infamy.

National Degeneration!

What a consummate band of scamps wield the destinies of this nation. From President to Treasurer, and Collector, and official Sexton, all is black-mail, fornication, ballot-stuffing, and unblushing robbery. Who can respect a President, who will permit such a villain as James Gordon Bennett to be a guest at his table, and dictate his domestic and foreign appointments, and demand the publication of the “List of Letters” in his chameleon and most infamous Journal, to the exclusion of the New York Sun, which has the highest city circulation, and which should publish the Letters according to the Acts of Congress. Did not Bennett first support George Law, and then Fremont, down to the last hour of the election? And did he not traduce Buchanan, as no other man in America? And why does Buchanan kiss the rod that strove to smite him? And why does he permit him to visit the White House, as his most distinguished guest? Is it because he fears he will expose the motive of his intimate relations with Daniel E. Sickles, and give some curious reminiscences of Fanny White’s notorious tour in Europe, while Dan was his Private Secretary and flying Minister to Spain? Ostensibly, it was Buchanan’s fear of Bennett’s hostility to his Kansas views, but in reality, it was his dread of Bennett’s disclosure of hellish domestic events, during Fanny White’s European pilgrimage, that induced Buchanan to proffer Bennett the freedom of the White House, and that forced him to unite Bennett and Sickles in perpetual friendship. I can show where Bennett squints at Dan and Fan and Buck in the Herald, which shook the White House to its deep foundation. Two famous harlots long kept Daniel E. Sickles and Emanuel B. Hart, and the latter lives with a woman now, on the principles of Turkish Free Love. Fanny White kept Sickles until he went to board with a dancing master, whose wife he soon allures from the bed of her husband, and drives him from his own house. He then seduces their daughter, a mere child, who became six month’s pregnant. He now fears the law, and gets Bishop Hughes to marry him to the lovely and youthful creature of his seduction. He then introduces Mayor Ambrose C. Kingsland to his wife’s mother, with whom Kingsland has sexual intercourse. He then asks Mayor Kingsland to give him a certificate, that he had been married six months before, to cover the pregnancy of his wife. Kingsland hesitates, when Dan threatens to expose his sexual intercourse with his wife’s mother. Kingsland becomes alarmed and gives Dan the marriage certificate, and all is tranquil. When Dan became James Buchanan’s Private Secretary, at the Court of St. James, Fanny White visited London, and was very intimate with Buchanan, and Dan gave her passports all over Europe, as Mrs. James Gordon Bennett. Bennett ascertained this, and hence the long and bitter quarrel between Dan and Bennett. Dan got the Hon. John Wheeler to give Fanny White letters of introduction to certain parties at Niagara Falls, as Mrs. James Gordon Bennett. Fanny White now lives in New York, and Dan is still friendly with her, although she is kept by another. Emanuel B. Hart was long kept by Eliza Pratt, who got tired of him, and discarded him. He subsequently took a notorious wanton, named Louise Wallace, from a house of ill-fame, and lives with her now, and introduces her into the first circles of society. Sickles is now a member of Congress, and the most influential man under Buchanan in the White House, and Hart was appointed by Buchanan, Surveyor of the Port of New York, which is considered next in importance to the office of Collector. And yet there are no earthquakes. And the people tamely submit to this monstrous degradation. And these revelations may lead to a scuffle of death between Sickles, Hart, and myself. But if I were sure that my brains were to be strewn upon the pavement, I would disclose to the American people, that their public servants are thieves, and fornicators, and ballot-stuffers, and black-mailers. Public men who will keep vile women, or (what is infinitely more degrading,) be kept and fed and clothed by concubines, like Hart and Sickles, should be exposed and loathed by all virtuous minds. And Buchanan should be more despised than Hart and Sickles, for his known intimacy with them for years, and with Fanny White, and for his appointment of Hart as Surveyor, and for chopping off the heads of a hundred worthy officials, at the instigation of such a notorious rake, and thief, and ballot-stuffer as Daniel E. Sickles. Buchanan fears Sickles, Hart, Bennett, and Fanny White! God of Heaven! How the national morals have degenerated during the present century. At a recent dinner at the White House sat the President, Bennett, Russell, Hart and Sickles. The President sat beside Mrs. Dan Sickles—Bennett sat next to Mrs. Judge Russell—Russell sat alone—Emanuel B. Hart sat next to his Mistress, and Sickles next to Fanny White. What a mournful sacrilege! Violated shades of Washington! Jefferson! and Jackson! O Vernon! and Monticello! and the Hermitage! may thy hallowed verdure be forever green and fragrant. And paralysed be the monsters who trample thy mounds, and blight thy pretty violets. And is there an American, or a naturalized foreigner whose cheeks do not crimson at a bacchanal like this, in the sacred atmosphere of great Washington’s mausoleum? What! Shall a gang like this be permitted to desecrate the halls and seats once occupied by the most illustrious patriots that ever graced the earth? O, Father of Heaven! Do not abandon the honest Americans, nor the patriot pilgrims to these happy shores, who still are grateful for Thy protection of their immortal Fathers, and who will strive to elect men to wield their destinies, who cherish Thee, and will legislate for the honor and welfare and glory of their beloved country. Do not desert them, O God! is the fervent prayer of millions of noble Americans, and of all naturalized foreigners, who truly love Thee, and the free and sunny land of their adoption.

Does Mayor Tiemann know what became of the Lime Kiln Man? Most horrible disclosures! In God’s name, where are the People?

William O. Webb, now Superintendent of Potter’s Field, who was appointed by the Ten Governors, sold and delivered last winter, five hundred corpses to the body snatchers, and has sold about the same number for several winters past, for which he and others received $17 for each corpse, forming an aggregate of $8,500 that was received each winter. The bodies are disinterred in the night, during the favorable tides, and carried from Potter’s Field to the Dead House, on the shore of Ward’s Island,—sometimes in a sleigh, and sometimes in a wheelbarrow,—and delivered to the body snatchers, awaiting their arrival at the Dead House. William O. Webb directs the grave diggers to give no corpses to the body snatchers, who died of small pox, or other contagious diseases, nor badly mutilated bodies. Michael Gilmore was an Assistant Grave Digger, and is now a clerk of the Superintendent of Potter’s Field. Wm. O. Webb’s salary is $800 per annum—a house free of rent—a farm—fuel, and provisions, from the Ten Governors—and four paupers and a servant to manage his farm. Sometimes he has fifteen paupers to work his farm. Webb’s clerk receives $400 a year, and his wife $200, and they have a large house and extensive grounds, and a servant and fuel and provisions from the Ten Governors. Webb employs a boy, about sixteen years old, who buries the dead, and who has $300 per annum. This boy receives the dead bodies, and selects such as the Doctors desire, immediately on their reception at Potter’s Field. Sometimes an arm or a leg is dissevered, and sold to the Doctors. After the bodies are removed, the coffins are sawed and chopped, and packed in bags, and taken to Harlem, and used as fire wood. The bodies are stripped of their dead clothes, and the best part sold in the city, as apparel, and the residue as rags, which constantly exposes the city to contagion. The Ten Governors are familiar with these facts, and have some knowledge of what is done with the money that is received for the dead bodies. William O. Webb has long been the warm personal and political friend of Governor Daniel F. Tiemann, whose mutual relations have been of such a peculiar nature that, although Gov. Tiemann has often been apprised of Webb’s monstrous proceedings, yet he dared not advance a step towards his removal. Webb’s expenses as Superintendent of Potter’s Field are $5,000 per annum. A respectable man, with the best security, proposed to Mayor Tiemann, when he was Governor, to assume the management of Potter’s Field, for $1,000 per annum, without the salaries, houses, farms, paupers, and servants, fuel, and provisions that the Superintendent and Clerk, and their wives then and now receive, forming an aggregate of $5,000 per annum, exclusive of the $8,500 received by the Superintendent and others for dead bodies. And yet, such were the peculiar relations subsisting between Gov. Tiemann and Mr. Webb, that the former dared not accept a proposition so favorable to the Treasury of the City, for whose economical disbursements Gov. Tiemann professes such anxious regard. One of the grave diggers refused to sell the body snatchers any more bodies, and informed Gov. Tiemann of his determination, who exclaimed, with much levity: “If you interfere with their business, there will be no inquest held over your body.” Webb sold the corpse of his wife’s uncle, whose name was Brown, a builder, and when Brown’s relatives desired his body for respectable interment, Webb placed another corpse in the coffin, and sent it to them, which they interred as their dear relative. The Lime Kiln Man was borne to Potter’s Field, and when his friends heard the sad intelligence of his death and pauper interment, they raised funds, which they gave to Webb, with directions to exhume and respectably inter him. But Webb could not find the Lime Kiln Man, and placed another corpse in a coffin, and buried it, and when the friends of the Lime Kiln Man came to Potter’s Field, Mr. Webb led them to a grave, which he assured them was the Lime Kiln Man’s. At my trial, on the first Monday in August, I shall summon the Doctor, and the body snatchers connected with him, and the superintendent, clerk, grave diggers, and all others engaged in this awful sacrilege, to unmask the scoundrels connected with our public institutions.

Bennett, Greeley, and Raymond.

New York is the seat of Commerce, affluence, intelligence, and journalism, and the devil has placed at the head of the Press, three such rogues as Bennett, Greeley, and Raymond. I have personally known these desperate jugglers for twenty years, and if the reader is sceptical, when I brand them as unparalleled scoundrels, let him refer to the files of these editors, who fiercely denounce, and clearly prove each other to be incomparable villains, and in parallel columns, they assume to be the censors of the public morals, and anathematise rogues of every grade and country, whom they strive to allure to the embraces of the sacred virtues. The mighty destinies of our country are in the grasp of heartless black mail editors, and Bennett, Greeley, and Raymond never unite in matters of public good, nor in the election of meritorious citizens to public office. And when they scream loudest for the propagation of the public virtues, and the creation of wise public measures, their eyes are fastened on the devil, and his imps, and overshadowing schemes of public plunder. Their opinions have not half the force and purity of the humblest citizens, and yet, like foreign despots, they thrust their heresies into our skulls, and in connection with officials, as infamous as themselves, (whom they elect,) they trample our most sacred rights, and slyly appropriate the public treasure, and violate all laws, human and divine, and from whose editorial edicts there is no appeal. And thus the public evils of our country flow from such polluted sources, as the Herald, Times, and Tribune. If these three editors were as pure and patriotic as they profess to be, they would unite in the advocation of honest men for office, and discharge their thievish correspondents at Albany and Washington, (who are in collusion with official robbers, by direction of their employers,) and invariably oppose the election of vicious men to office. Bennett, Greeley, and Raymond, and other editorial rogues, never advocate the election of a man to office, without the pledge of a share of his influence and spoils, which is the real source of our public evils. They black mail on a scale of startling magnitude and boldness. They watch, with ceaseless vigilance, for facilities to seize the pap from the private and public purse. They level their fleetest and most envenomed arrows at the subordinate municipal officers, Mayors, Governors, National Collectors, Representatives, Senators, Cabinet officers, and the President, himself, whom they force to yield to their demands, or they spread terror into the camps of these public vultures. Bennett, Greeley, and Raymond have obtained their prodigious power, through the large number of fools that read their nonsense, and black mail philippics. If these idiots would cease to read their vile and selfish stuff, and patronise those editors who proclaim the truth, and strive to promote the public welfare, such men as Bennett, Greeley, and Raymond would soon become the paupers and loafers and scamps of twenty years ago, when they had no place to lay their wicked skulls, nor credit for a loaf of bread.

The Peter Cooper Institute!

In front of this sham Institute is painted, in blazing letters: “These Stores, and the Story above to Let. Enquire in office, 2d story.” And Peter might have advertised a portion of the stories above the two lower stories, as he has rooms to let in every story of the building. Even around the lecture room, in the second and third stories, he has constructed small rooms to let to any adventurer who comes along. Such was his avarice, and so greedy was he to gouge all the area he possibly could from earth and Heaven, that he dug as far towards China as he dared, and approached Heaven’s dome, until his architect warned him to stop, lest the whole edifice tumble into one common ruin, so feeble was the building’s foundation. And now, Peter Cooper! I demand you to instantly surrender your right and that of your heirs, (including Mayor Tiemann and Edward Cooper,) to the building known as the Cooper Institute. You have made a great noise, for half a dozen years, about your extraordinary philanthropy, and you have publicly proclaimed, a thousand times, that you intended to give your “Art and Science” edifice to the city, entirely for educational purposes. And you have got its tax of $8,000 reduced with this plea. And you have also got the Croton water tax removed, although you have got a steam engine in the building. And yet you still hold the property, in the name of yourself and heirs, and from what I know of your penurious propensities, I could almost swear that you never meant to give it to the city. Was not the building publicly dedicated long since? And where are the three thousand pupils, with green satchels, with whom we all expected to see the building teem? There is more cheerfulness and utility in the deserts of Arabia, and the classic ruins and crumbling desolations of the Ancient States, than in the dismal and Shylock echoes of your bogus and uncomely structure. And why do you still clutch it to your heart, like an expiring miser, his miserable dross? And why did you so construct the building, as to render it utterly inappropriate for students? You have told beggars, high and low, for half a dozen years, that you could not give them a crum of bread, because you were devoting all your surplus means to the construction of the Cooper Institute. And now that it is erected, and you have got all you desired, (and have toiled thirty years to achieve,) in the election of Tiemann, your son-in-law, as Mayor, through your specious and fallacious Philanthropy, and in the appointment of Edward Cooper, your own son, as Street Commissioner, by Tiemann,—after you have reached the goal of your miserly and ungodly ambition, and have got all New York in your breeches pocket, I find you apply your fingers to your infernal nose, and hurl defiance at the people, whom you have bamboozled, and evince a disposition to forever hold the building over which you have raised such a clatter for half a dozen years, and now actually advertise the stores and rooms of nearly the entire edifice, and of course, will put the rents in your yawning pockets, in the name of the President and Board of Trustees of the immortal Cooper Institute, which illustrious Chartered Body only comprises Peter Cooper! O Peter! Peter! you are a consummate impostor, and all the people will soon conceive you to be so, unless you instantly disgorge the property you long promised to give them for educational purposes. And now, Peter, go to the City Hall at once, and record the Institute in the name of the people, who will ever bless you for your noble philanthropy.

Advertisements—25 Cents a line.

Credit—From two to four seconds, or as long as the Advertiser can hold his breath! Letters and Advertisements to be left at No. 114 Nassau street, second story, front room.

NOTICE TO FARMERS AND MARKET GARDENERS.—City Inspector’s Department, New York, June 16, 1858.—In conformity with the following resolution, the space therein mentioned will be permitted to be used a place, by farmers and gardeners, for the sale of vegetables and garden produce, until the hour of 12 o’clock, M., daily—the use to be free of charge:

Resolved, That permission be, and is hereby, given to farmers and market gardeners, to occupy daily, until 12 M., free of charge, the vacant space of the northern and southern extremities of the intersection of Broadway and Sixth avenue, between Thirty-second and Thirty-fifth streets, without infringing upon the streets which the said space intersects, for the purpose only of selling vegetables and market produce, of their own farms or gardens, under the supervision of the City Inspector.

Also, by resolution of the Common Council, The use of Gouverneur slip is granted to farmers and gardeners for the sale of produce from wagons.

GEO. W. MORTON, City Inspector.

JOSEPH CANNING, Sup’t of Markets.

NOTICE—TO PERSONS KEEPING SWINE, OWNERS OF PROPERTY WHERE THE SAME MAY BE KEPT, AND ALL OTHERS INTERESTED. At a meeting of the Mayor and Commissioners of Health, held at the City Hall of the City of New York, Friday, June 18th, 1858, the following preamble and resolutions were adopted:

Whereas, A large number of swine are kept in various portions of the city; and whereas, it is the general practice of persons so keeping swine, to boil offal and kitchen refuse and garbage, whereby a highly offensive and dangerous nuisance is created, therefore, be it

Resolved, That this Board, of the Mayor and Commissioners of Health, deeming swine kept south of (86th) street, in this city, to be creative of a nuisance and detrimental to the public health, therefore, the City Inspector be, and he is hereby, authorized and directed to take, seize, and remove from any and all places and premises, all and every swine found or kept on any premises in any place in the city of New York southerly of said street, and to cause all such swine to be removed to the Public Pound, or other suitable place beyond the limits of the city or northerly of said street, and to cause all premises or places wherein, or on which, said swine may have been so found or kept, to be thoroughly cleaned and purified as the City Inspector shall deem necessary to secure the preservation of the public health, and that all expenses incurred thereby constitute a lien on the lot, lots or premises from which said nuisance shall have been abated or removed.

Resolved, That the foregoing resolutions shall take effect from and after the first day of July next, and that public notice be given of the same by publication in the Corporation papers to that date, and that notice may be given to persons keeping swine by circulars delivered on the premises, and that all violations of this order be prosecuted by the proper legal authorities, on complaint from the City Inspector or his officers.

City Inspector’s Department, }

New York, June 18, 1858. }

All persons keeping swine, or upon whose property or premises the same may be kept, are hereby notified that the above resolutions will be strictly enforced from and after the first day of July next.

GEO. W. MORTON, City Inspector.

FRANCIS B. BALDWIN, WHOLESALE and RETAIL CLOTHING & FURNISHING WAREHOUSE, 70 and 72 Bowery, between Canal and Hester sts., New York. Large and elegant assortment of Youths’ and Boys’ Clothing.

F. B. BALDWIN,

J. G. BARNUM.

F. B. BALDWIN has just opened his New and Immense Establishment. THE LARGEST IN THE CITY! An entire New Stock of GENTLEMEN’S, YOUTH’S and CHILDREN’S CLOTHING, recently manufactured by the best workmen in the city, is now opened for inspection. Also, a superior stock of FURNISHING GOODS. All articles are of the Best Quality, and having been purchased during the crisis, WILL BE SOLD VERY LOW! The Custom Department contains the greatest variety of CLOTHS, CASSIMERES, and VESTINGS.

Mr. BALDWIN has associated with him Mr. J. G. BARNUM, who has had great experience in the business, having been thirty years connected with the leading Clothing Establishments of the city.

THOMAS A. DUNN, 506 EIGHTH AVENUE, has a very choice assortment of Wines, Brandies, Cordials, and Segars, which he will sell at prices that will yield a fair profit. All my democratic friends, and my immediate associates in the Boards of Aldermen and Councilmen are respectfully invited to call in their rambles through Eighth Avenue, and enjoy a good Havana segar, and nice, sparkling champagne, and very exhilerating brandy. For the segars, I will charge my political friends and associates only five pence each, and for the brandy only ten pence per half gill, and for the champagne only four shillings a glass, or two dollars a bottle.

So call, kind friends, and sing a glee,
And laugh and smoke and drink with me,
Sweet Sangaree
Till you can’t see:
(Chorus)—At your expense!
(Which pays my rents,)
For my fingers do you see
O’er my nose gyrating free?

THOMAS A. DUNN, No. 506 Eighth avenue.

MRS. S. S. BIRD’S LADIES’ AND GENTLEMEN’S Dining and Oyster Saloons, No. 31 Canal street, near East Broadway, and 264 Division street, New York.

Oysters Pickled to Order.

FULLMER AND WOOD, CARRIAGE Manufacturers, 239 West 19th Street, New York.

Horse-shoeing done with despatch, and in the most scientific manner, and on reasonable terms.

MCSPEDON AND BAKER’S STATIONERY WAREHOUSE and Envelope Manufactory, Nos. 29, 31, and 33, Beekman Street, New York.

Envelopes of all patterns, styles, and quality, on hand, and made to order for the trade and others, by Steam Machinery. Patented April 8th, 1856.

COREY AND SON, MERCHANT’S EXCHANGE, Wall street, New York.—Notaries Public and Commissioners.—United State’s Passports issued in 36 hours,—Bills of Exchange, Drafts, and Notes protested,—Marine protests noted and extended.

EDWIN F. COREY,

EDWIN F. COREY, Jr.

J. VAN TINE, SHANGAE RESTAURANT, No. 2, Dey street, New York.

S. & J. W. BARKER, GENERAL AUCTIONEERS & REAL ESTATE BROKERS. Loans negotiated, Houses and Stores Rented, Stocks and Bonds Sold at Auction or Private Sale.

Also, FURNITURE SALES attended to at private houses. Office, 14 Pine street, under Commonwealth Bank.

CARLTON HOUSE, 496 BROADWAY, NEW York. Bates and Holden, Proprietors.

THEOPHILUS BATES.

OREL J. HOLDEN.

TRIMMING MANUFACTURERS.—B. S. YATES & CO., 639 Broadway, New York.

Fringes, Cords, Tassels, Loops, Gimps,
and Gimp Bands.

WM. COULTER, Carpenter.—I have long been engaged as a Carpenter, and I assure all who will favor me with their patronage, that I will build as good houses, or anything else in my line, as any other carpenter in the city of New York. I will also be as reasonable in charges for my work as any other person.

WILLIAM COULTER, Carpenter.

Rear of 216 East Twentieth street, New York.

GERARD BETTS & CO., AUCTION AND Commission Merchants, No. 106, Wall street, corner of Front street, New York.

W. W. OSBORN, MERCHANT TAILOR, 9 Chamber street, near Chatham street, New York.

SOLOMON BANTA, Architect, No. 93 Amos street, New York. I have built as many houses and stores as any Architect in this city, or the United States, and I can produce vouchers to that effect; and I flatter myself that I can build edifices that will compare favorably, in point of beauty and durability, with those of any architect in this country. I am prepared to receive orders in my line of business, at No. 93 Amos street, New York.

SOLOMON BANTA.

ROBERT ONDERDONK—THIRTEENTH Ward Hotel, 405 and 407 Grand street, corner of Clinton street, New York.

WILLIAM M. TWEED, CHAIR, & OFFICE Furniture Dealer and Manufacturer,

No. 239 Broadway, corner of Read street, New York. Room No. 15.

FASHION HOUSE.—JOSEPH HYDE PROPRIETOR, corner Grand and Essex street. Wines, Liquors, and Cigars of the best brands. He invites his friends to give him a call. Prompt and courteous attention given his patrons.

WILLIAM A. CONKLIN, ATTORNEY AND COUNSELLOR AT LAW, No. 176 Chatham street, New York. Any business entrusted to his charge from citizens of this city or any part of the country, will receive prompt and faithful attention, and be conducted on reasonable terms.

WILLIAM A. CONKLIN.

HERRING’S PATENT CHAMPION FIRE AND BURGLAR Proof Safe, with Hall’s Patent Powder Proof Locks, afford the greatest security of any Safe in the world. Also, Sideboard and Parlor Safes, of elegant workmanship and finish, for plate, &c. S. C. HERRING & CO.,

251 Broadway.

JAMES MELENFY, (SUCCESSOR TO SAMUEL Hopper,) Grocer, and Wholesale and Retail Dealer in Pure Country Milk. Teas, Coffee, Sugars & Spices. Flour, Butter, Lard, Cheese, Eggs &c. No. 158, Eighth Avenue, Near 18th Street, New York. Families supplied by leaving their address at the Store.

BOOT & SHOE EMPORIUMS. EDWIN A. BROOKS, Importer and Manufacturer of Boots, Shoes & Gaiters, Wholesale and Retail, No. 575 Broadway, and 150 Fulton Street, New York.

J. W. MASON, MANUFACTURER, WHOLESALE and Retail dealers in all kinds of Chairs, Wash Stands, Settees, &c. 377 & 379 Pearl Street, New York.

Cane and Wood Seat Chairs, in Boxes, for Shipping.

BENJAMIN JONES, COMMISSION DEALER, IN Real Estate. Houses and stores and lots for sale in all parts of the city. Office at the junction of Broadway, Seventh Avenue, and Forty-Sixth Street.

FOLEY’S CELEBRATED “GOLD PENS.” For sale by all Stationers and Jewellers.

OFFICE AND STORE,

163 BROADWAY.

JAMES DONNELLY’S COAL YARD,—Twenty-sixth street and Second Avenue. I always have all kinds of coal on hand, and of the very best quality, which I will sell as low as any other coal dealer in the United States.

JAMES DONNELLY.

EDWARD PHALON & SON, 497 and 517 Broadway, New York—Depots for the sale of Perfumery, and every article connected with the Toilet.

We now introduce the “BOUQUET D’OGARITA, or Wild Flower of Mexico,” which is superior to any thing of the kind in the civilized world.

EDWARD PHALON & SON.

SAMUEL SNEDEN, SHIP & STEAMBOAT BUILDER.—My Office is at No. 31 Corlears street, New York; and my yards and residence are at Greenpoint. I have built Ships and Steamers for every portion of the Globe, for a long term of years, and continue to do so on reasonable terms.

SAMUEL SNEDEN.

JOHN B. WEBB, BOAT BUILDER, 718 WATER STREET. My Boats are of models and materials unsurpassed by those of any Boat Builder in the World. Give me a call, and if I don’t please you, I will disdain to charge you for what does not entirely satisfy you.

JOHN B. WEBB.

ALANSON T. BRIGGS—DEALER IN FLOUR BARRELS, Molasses Casks, Water, and all other kinds of Casks. Also, new flour barrels and half-barrels; a large supply constantly on hand. My Stores are at Nos. 62, 63, 64, 69, 73, 75, 77 and 79 Rutger’s Slip; at 235, 237, and 239 Cherry street; also, in South and Water streets, between Pike and Rutger’s Slip, extending from street to street. My yards in Williamsburgh are at Furman & Co.’s Dock. My yards in New York are at the corner of Water and Gouverneur streets; and in Washington street, near Canal; and at Leroy Place. My general Office is at 64 Rutger’s Slip.

ALANSON T. BRIGGS.

FULTON IRON WORKS.—JAMES MURPHY & CO., manufacturers of Marine and Land Engines, Boilers, &c. Iron and Brass Castings. Foot of Cherry street, East River.

BRADDICK & HOGAN, SAILMAKERS, No. 272 South Street, New York.

Awnings, Tents, and Bags made to order.

JESSE A. BRADDICK,

RICHARD HOGAN.

J. N. GENIN, FASHIONABLE HATTER, 214 Broadway, New York.

GENIN’S LADIES’ & CHILDREN’S OUTFITTING Bazaar, 513 Broadway, (St. Nicholas Hotel, N. Y.)

WILLIAM M. SOMERVILLE, WHOLESALE AND Retail Druggist and Apothecary, 205 Bleecker-st, corner Minetta, opposite Cottage Place, New York. All the popular Patent Medicines, fresh Swedish Leeches, Cupping, &c. Physicians’ Prescriptions accurately prepared.

WM. M. SOMERVILLE.

A. W. & T. HUME, MERCHANT TAILORS, No. 82 Sixth Avenue, New York. We keep a large and elegant assortment of every article that a gentleman requires. We make Coats, Vests and Pants, after the latest Parisian fashions, and on reasonable terms.

A. W. & T. HUME.

THE WASHINGTON, By BARTLETT & GATES, No. 1 Broadway, New York. Come and see us, good friends, and eat and drink and be merry, in the same capacious and patriotic halls where the immortal Washington’s voice and laugh once reverberated.

O come to our Hotel,

And you’ll be treated well.

BARTLETT & GATES.

EXCELSIOR PRINTING HOUSE, 211 CENTRE ST., IS furnished with every facility, latest improved presses, and the newest styles of type—for the execution of Book, Job and Ornamental Printing. Call and see specimens.

CHARLES FRANCIS, SADDLER, (ESTABLISHED IN 1808,) Sign of the Golden Horse, 39 Bowery, New York, opposite the Theatre. Mr. F. will sell his articles as low as any other Saddler in America, and warrant them to be equal to any in the World.

H. N. WILD, STEAM CANDY MANUFACTURER, No. 451 Broadway, bet. Grand and Howard streets, New York. My Iceland Moss and Flaxseed Candy will cure Coughs and Sneezes in a very short time.

JAMES GRIFFITHS, (Late CHATFIELD & GRIFFITHS,) No. 273 Grand st., New York. A large stock of well-selected Cloths, Cassimeres, Vestings, &c., on hand. Gent’s, Youths’ and Children’s Clothing, Cut and Made in the most approved style. All cheap for Cash.

J. AGATE & CO., MEN’S FURNISHING GOODS and Shirt Manufacturers, 256 Broadway, New York.

Shirts made to order and guaranteed to fit.

J. AGATE, F. W. TALKINGTON.

BILLIARD TABLES.—PHELAN’S IMPROVED BILLIARD Tables and Combination Cushions—Protected by letters patent, dated Feb. 19, 1856; Oct. 28, 1856; Dec. 8, 1857; Jan. 12, 1858. The recent improvements in these Tables make them unsurpassed in the world. They are now offered to the scientific Billiard players as combining speed with truth, never before obtained in any Billiard Table. Sales-rooms Nos. 786 and 788 Broadway, New York. Manufactory No. 53 Ann Street.

O’CONNOR & COLLENDOR, Sole Manufacturers.

S. L. OLMSTEAD, IMPORTER, MANUFACTURER and Jobber of Men’s Furnishing Goods, No. 24 Barclay Street, corner of Church, New York.

C. B. HATCH, HILLER & MERSEREAU, Importers and Jobbers of Men’s Furnishing Goods, and Manufacturers of the Golden Hill Shirts, 99 Chambers Street, N. E. corner Church Street, New York.

L. A. ROSENMILLER, DRUGGIST, NO. 172 EIGHTH Avenue, New York. Cupping & Leeching. Medicines at all hours.

*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK STEPHEN H. BRANCH'S ALLIGATOR, VOL. 1 NO. 15, JULY 31, 1858 ***

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Table of Contents

- STEPHEN H. BRANCH’S ALLIGATOR.

- James Gordon Bennett and Fanny Elssler.

- Richard B. Connolly and other Conspirators against my Liberty.

- My Trial.

- National Degeneration!

- Does Mayor Tiemann know what became of the Lime Kiln Man? Most horrible disclosures! In God’s name, where are the People?

- Bennett, Greeley, and Raymond.

- The Peter Cooper Institute!

- Advertisements—25 Cents a line.

- THE FULL PROJECT GUTENBERG™ LICENSE